5/25/2015 – Carmen J. Carlisle, Clayton

5/25/2015 – Carmen J. Carlisle, Clayton

Mrs. Carmen J. Carlisle, age 93, of the Deferno Road, died Sunday, May 24th, at the home of her daughter Cecile Norfolk, where she resided for the last 10 years.

The funeral will be at Noon, Wednesday, May 27th, at the T.R. Jetty Funeral Home in Clayton, with Father Arthur LaBaff officiating. Calling hours will be 10am until the time of the service. A reception will be held at the C-Way Restaurant at 1:30 following the service. Burial will be Thursday, at 11am, at Notre Dame Cemetery in Ogdensburg.

Carmen was born November 21, 1921, in Ogdensburg, the daughter of Ernest and Mable Denny Montroy. She graduated from St. Mary’s School in Clayton.

Three husbands, Earl Carlisle, James Atkins, and Chester Stokes all died before her.

Carmen worked for a time, at the State Hospital in Ogdensburg and cooked in various restaurants in the Clayton area. She also did custodial work at the Key Bank and the U.S. Post Office in Clayton.

She was a past member of the Clayton American Legion Post 821 Ladies Auxiliary.

Carmen enjoyed collecting all different sports cards, and mainly just helping everyone.

Surviving are her children, one son James (Linda) Atkins Jr. of Hamlin, NY; five daughters Cecile Norfolk of Clayton, Sally Carollo of Cape Vincent and her fiancé Wayne King; Rene (Gary) Futch of North Carolina; Carmen Ann Nutting of Dexter, and Helen (Donald) Perkins of Chaumont; many grandchildren, great grandchildren, and great great grandchildren; nieces and nephews.

One son, Ernest Stokes, died at age 11. One brother and two sisters also died before her, Gerald Montroy, Marie Fidak, and Dorothy Abbrid, all of Ogdensburg.

Donations can be made in her name to either T.I.E.R.S. or River Hospital.


  1. Caryl Mallette Posted

    I remember waiting on Carmen many years ago at the Grand Union. She was in everyday and she was as always whistling! No matter how bad a day you were having, she always brought a smile to your face! God Bless you all.

  2. Linda Atkins Posted

    Death of A Matriarch… (A poem by Tegram)

    When the matriarch of a family dies,
    It is a difficult feeling to describe,
    The death heralds the end of an era,
    The gradual disappearance of a Legacy,
    Every family member becomes paralyzed
    by the vacancy,
    The Leader and Director of the familys’
    hopes and dreams has gone to rest,
    Declaring, “It is time for everyone to live
    up to their personal best,”
    A reliable figure of normalcy and tradition
    has exited gracefully,
    Leaving behind the formula to living
    life decently

  3. Sally Bogenschutz Posted

    Dear Helen, Sally, Cecile and family – I remember your mother with such fond memories from way back when….. She always had a smile on her face. I know you will miss her a great deal. It’s hard to let them go even when you know it’s best. My thoughts and prayers are with all of you at this sad time.

  4. James Atkins Posted

    My Mom was the greatest Lady in my life. She was the kindest and most giving person I know. My heart is sadden but I know she is with the Lord and those who went before have greeted her and taken her in their wings. Mom always said she never meant anyone she didn’t like and I never meant anyone who didn’t like her. She was always looking to do for others because she said some people just need it more then I do. She had many friends from everywhere, far and near. I would meet people who were from another state and tell them where I was from. They would say they had been there and ask,”Do you know a Lady named Carmen.” My Mom ended her journey here on earth and began a new eternal one in heaven. She us left me with many beautiful memories. I will have my Mom with me always in my heart and soul.

  5. Lori Norfolk Posted

    Carmen was a true matriarch she was always good to me treated me like family not just an in law. She will be missed. my thoughts are with the family at this hard time.



  7. Kimberly Atkins DeRider Posted

    Even though we have been many miles and years away from each other she was and is always in my heart. Family should always be treasured no matter what life brings.
    Enjoy your new life in heaven grandma Carmen. Born an angel once more.

  8. Cheryl Clark Posted

    Carmen, Renee and Helen, my condolences. Scott just told me today that Aunt Carmen had passed away. It’s always hard when you lose your mother. There is nothing I can say that will make it better. Just have to believe that no matter where you go she will always be with you.

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